Love is hard to findWe all live in the hope of loving and being loved. There it is....very simple statement that is so true.

Years ago I went into business for myself, and I opened a dating service. It was different than anything out there at the time. Now there are systems built on the path that we established and research that we accomplished. Services like E-Harmony.com and Match.com with Dr. Phil. But then the concept that I put forward was totally new.

I got into it because I had gotten divorced and was having a tough time figuring out the dating game. I did a lot of research and the more I read and learned the more I found out that it is a miracle if anyone finds anybody.

And so it is today. Even when you think you have found someone....you may be wrong. And then another great truth I learned is reinforced. There is no love without pain. 

Interested in a million musings ? click on this link:http://www.amillionmusings.blogspot.com/  

Let's start part two of Questions and Answers to Help The Officiate with a quick review of Part One.

So far we've given the officiate all your contact information, the location, day and time of the ceremony and if there is a rehearsal, it's day, time and location.

We've let the officiate know the ages of the couple and whether it's their first marriage or they have been married before. Why is this important? It is my philosophy (as I mentioned in part one) that weddings should not be "one size fits all." So the message and tone of a wedding for a twenty something couple both getting married for the first time is a different message and ceremony than I would write for a couple in their 40's who have been married before and have grown kids.

We have determined the style of the ceremony Traditional Religious, Non Denominational Religious, Spiritual (A non religious ceremony with quotes from poets, philosophers and great writers,)  Civil (Secular,). Blended (a service that is a blend of two of the above.  Other officiates may call them something else.

Last thing we covered in part one was the overall tone of the service. The feel of any of the styles listed above can be varied by tone selected.  

There are exceptions but I recommend that ceremonies last about 25 minutes. Longer than this and people get fidgety. Much shorter than 25 minutes the ceremony doesn't seem significant to the life event that is a marriage.

www.remembranceweddings.com
a service of the Spiritual Growth Fellowship

Beautiful, Meaningful & Memorable
Romantic Personal Wedding Ceremonies You’ll Remember Forever

The Most Reverend Doctor Charles E. Million, D.D.
13001 Dieterle Lane Saint Louis, MO 63127

Email:maxmillion1@earthlink.net 
Phone: 314-965-5648
Toll Free: 888-521-8146
Cell: 314-503-4727
Fax: 314-984-0828

Every officiate has a different way of collecting the information they use to write your ceremony. That is, if they write a different ceremony for different couples. Not everyone does.

Our opinion is that wedding ceremonies should  not be "one size fits all."  Our mission is to provide you with a ceremony which is Beautiful to hear or read, Meaningful to the bride, groom and their guests,  and Memorable to all who participate or witness it.

I am dividing the questions into two parts....Part 1 is this week. I'm told all the time that I have to keep things short on the net because many folks have short attention spans. 

Cordially,

Charles Million

This week we're going to talk a little about rehearsals. Later I will talk specifically about how I do a wedding rehearsal. Today's blog is about the traditional guidelines for the procession, where everybody stands during the ceremony, and the recession. Much of this material I gathered years ago from someplace on the net so I don't claim this is all original. I should credit someone but its been years since I gathered the info and I don't remember where I got it.

Whether you have a rehearsal is really up to you. I certainly wouldn't try to strong arm you into having a rehearsal if you don't want one. If you have a very simple wedding, no bridesmaids or groomsmen....or your bridesmaids and groomsmen are very experienced at weddings and already know what to do, you can get by without a rehearsal.

My personal opinion is that a wedding is a significant event in your life and a rehearsal always makes a wedding go smoother.

What I am outlining is the general guidelines for traditional way of doing things. I want to state up front, and will reiterate throughout, this is your wedding and you can change any of the following to suit what you want and need on your special day.

Personally I love those folks who get creative at their weddings. Dancing down the procession aisle, masks et al. adds to what makes your wedding unique to you and fun for the guests.

Pastoral Counseling and Testing
Nobody taught you how to be married. It is a simple fact that other than living in our own families and using them as models, few folks really have any training in couple relationships.

Whether there are issues to be discussed, or you just want to prepare for a sound marriage you can count on Remembrance Weddings. We have years of experience in relationship building, strengthening and counseling with couples.

Not your typical pastoral counseling on religion and your relationship, our association with Relationship Counseling Associates allows us to offer various forms of testing and counseling to give your marriage the best possible start.  

One which is particularly relevant to couples is “Heart to Heart.” This computer driven test facilitates the couple knowing each other better and reveals topics for discussion in the twelve critical areas that cause problems for relationships.

The sessions that follow the testing are designed to help the couples communicate more effectively, solve misunderstandings and build a stronger relationship.  

Other available testing will identify your personality type, temperament and learning and communications styles to facilitate better understanding and communication with your partner.
This is not a requirement for us to perform your ceremony, We recommend it to all our clients.

Ask yourself this question: Who Taught You How to Make a Marriage Work?

The sorry fact is that nobody did. A successful marriage starts with love. But it requires skills to make it last. And in most cases nobody taught you what those skills are and how to make them work in your relationship.

To better their chances for success, couples need training in 12 specific areas.  How to negotiate power in the relationship; how to fight fair; parenting and discipline; family and friends; sex and intimacy; finances and goals; are just some of the skills you need to go the distance.. 
We can provide pastoral counseling and training in relationship building prior to or after the ceremony to help couples strengthen their relationship. 

This is not a requirement for us to perform your wedding ceremony. But we recommend marital counseling to all our clients….even if you choose to get it elsewhere.

Most marriage counselors will tell you that by the time most couples come to therapy they have built up resentment and walls which will never go away.

A better approach is to get the skills you need and counseling early before little things become big ones. We are experienced at helping you strengthen your relationship before or  after your wedding. We love it when our couples live "happily ever after."